Fundamental to my approach to therapy is that although different theories about people and their problems are helpful and thought provoking, every individual is unique and that only in paying detailed attention to our own experience can we understand our own, very particular, way of dealing with the world. Individual psychotherapy is primarily a place to pay that kind of attention to our own process, to really get to know who we are and what we want.
Our reactions to events and people are formed from a complex interaction of actions, thoughts, feelings, beliefs and bodily responses. Most of what we do, we do out of habit, without noticing how we are doing it. Understanding where our behaviour comes from is only half the battle, noticing how we do it, in detail, is the key to transformation.
By paying attention we can see how our behaviours start and how the different aspects (thinking, feeling, doing) interact with each other. With this information we can develop the possibility of change. We can learn to manage ourselves as we choose and leave behind patterns of behaviour that don't feel right or are no longer in our best interest.